


Failing is not just for failures

by messageredacted



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Animated Gifs, Epilepsy Warning, Flushed Romance | Matesprits, Illustrated Fic, M/M, canon character death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-17
Updated: 2012-09-17
Packaged: 2017-11-14 07:22:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,351
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/512758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/messageredacted/pseuds/messageredacted
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>CCG: IF I RUN INTO HIM AGAIN, I'M...<br/> CCG: I DON'T EVEN KNOW.<br/> CCG: HE BETTER PRAY TO ALL HIS MURDERED ANGELS IT DOESN'T HAPPEN.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [shellfishDimes](https://archiveofourown.org/users/shellfishDimes/gifts).



> Happy birthday Lyns.
> 
> Title and inspiration from [Failing is not just for failures](http://listener.bandcamp.com/track/failing-is-not-just-for-failures-2) by Listener, from the album Wooden Heart.

CCG: BEFORE I GO    
CCG: EVERYONE SHOULD ALSO KNOW ERIDAN HAD A COMPLETE SHITHIVE MELTDOWN TOO    
CCG: HE'S GOING AROUND KILLING PEOPLE WITH HIS MAGIC WAND    
CCG: SO KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR HIM.   
CCG: IF I RUN INTO HIM AGAIN, I'M...   
 CCG: I DON'T EVEN KNOW.    
CCG: HE BETTER PRAY TO ALL HIS MURDERED ANGELS IT DOESN'T HAPPEN.   
PAST caligulasAquarium [PCA] 311 HOURS AGO responded to memo.  
PCA: a magic wwand is that so   
 PCA: kar come on noww evveryone fuckin KNOWWS this memos rubbish  
CCG: HEY ASSHOLE   
CCG: CONSIDER OUR "PACT" OVER  
PCA: wwevve got a pact  
CCG: NOT ANYMORE   
CCG: YOU ARE DEAD TO ME   
CCG: PAST YOU, PRESENT YOU, FUTURE YOU   
CCG: AND ABOVE ALL, UGLY SCARFNECKED DOUCHEBAG HIPSTER YOU   
CCG: WAIT I FORGOT, ALL OF THE YOUS ARE THAT YOU   
CCG: IF I WASN'T SO TERRIFIED, I'D BE CONSUMED WITH ANGER, AND AS SOON AS I'M DONE COWERING IN A DARK CORNER HIDING FROM THAT HONKING MURDEROUS TOOL, I'M GOING TO HUNT YOU DOWN AND FILLET YOU WITH MY SICKLE.   
PCA: wwhoa kar   
PCA: this is nothin if not flatterin but dont you think youre comin on a little strong   
CCG: OH GOD   
CCG: I AM NOT HITTING ON YOU IDIOT, THIS IS HONEST TO GOD PLATONIC ENMITY   
CCG: LIKE IN THE "I REALLY DO WANT YOU TO DIE" KIND OF WAY.   
CCG: I AM NOT INITIATING AN ELABORATE CALIGINOUS WALTZ WITH YOU YOU DESPERATE SHIT.   
PCA: i mean yeah obvviously i kneww you wwerent serious   
PCA: i guess i appreciate the effort youre puttin into cheerin me up   
PCA: i can alwways count on you for some good ironic repartee kar nobody else really gets our sense a humor   
CCG: UGH, NO   
PCA: are you busy   
PCA: you said youd try to make it to lowwaa soon wwell howw about it   
CCG: YOU’RE NOT IN LOWAA.   
PCA: wwhat the fuck kar of course i am   
PCA: look im 311 hours in your past wwhere else wwould i be   
CCG: NO.   
PCA: wwhat do you mean no   
PCA: im fuckin surrounded by angels kar   
PCA: remember wwe talked about this   
PCA: youre supposed to accuse me a killin them right noww   
PCA: remember   
CCG: THAT CAME LATER IN THE CONVERSATION.   
CCG: YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO TELL ME TO TELL MY PAST SELF TO GO VISIT YOU.   
CCG: THEN I ACCUSE YOU OF HITTING ON ME.   
PCA: oh yeah   
PCA: so uh   
PCA: i guess that means wwevve already had this convversation huh   
CCG: YEAH.   
PCA: am i asleep   
CCG: I DON’T THINK SO.   
PCA: um   
PCA: does that mean im   
CCG: YEAH.   
PCA: wwhat about you   
CCG: I’M IN THE COMPUTER LAB RIGHT NOW.   
CCG: THERE ARE BODIES ALL OVER THE PLACE, AND I’M KIND OF TERRIFIED TO TURN AROUND.   
CCG: SOLLUX IS LYING ON THE DESK. YOU BURNED HIS EYES OUT WITH YOUR SCIENCE WAND, AND I KNOCKED ALL HIS TEETH OUT WHEN I DROPPED HIM DOWN THE STAIRS.   
CCG: AND THEN HE DIED WHILE SENDING THE METEOR TOWARD THE NEW SESSION AND HIS OTHER DREAM SELF FUCKED OFF WITH ARADIA SO I DON’T KNOW WHY HE’S STILL HERE WITH ME RIGHT NOW.   
CCG: I THOUGHT I WAS HIDING HERE FROM GAMZEE BUT I SPECIFICALLY REMEMBER THAT ASSHOLE ABSCONDING WITH A BUNCH OF CORPSES ONE SWEEP AGO. I HAVEN’T SEEN HIM SINCE.   
CCG: BUT I DON’T REMEMBER DYING.   
CCG: SO I GUESS THIS MEANS I’M ASLEEP.   
PCA: it wwas kan wwasnt it   
PCA: i sorta remember a chainsaww   
CCG: YEAH.   
CCG: BUT TO BE FAIR, YOU KILLED HER FIRST.   
PCA: did i   
PCA: oh   
PCA: yeah i think i did   
CCG: I HAVEN’T TALKED TO YOU SINCE THEN.   
CCG: I’VE TALKED TO A LOT OF ERIDANS. THERE ARE A FUCKLOAD OF YOU AROUND HERE.   
CCG: BUT THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I’VE TALKED TO   
CCG: YOU KNOW   
CCG: YOU.   
PCA: the real one   
CCG: THE ONE WHO KILLED MY FRIENDS.   
PCA: kan got better   
CCG: DON’T EVEN PRETEND THAT THAT EXCUSES WHAT YOU DID.   
PCA: no i knoww it doesnt   
PCA: i wwas sorta jokin   
CCG: I’D APPRECIATE IT IF YOU WOULDN’T.   
CCG: IT’S STILL KIND OF A SENSITIVE SUBJECT.   
CCG: ALTHOUGH IT’S BEEN A SWEEP SINCE THEN. I GUESS I’M NOT AS ANGRY WITH YOU AS I WAS WHEN I FIRST HAD THIS CONVERSATION.   
PCA: yeah im pretty sure you threatened to kill me last time   
CCG: YEAH.   
CCG: WELL.   
CCG: I’M GOING TO BE HONEST HERE.   
CCG: I DON’T THINK I WOULD HAVE DONE THAT.   
PCA: wwhy not   
CCG: I JUST   
CCG: I DON’T KNOW.   
CCG: I MEAN, GAMZEE DID THE SAME THING YOU DID, AND I FORGAVE HIM.   
CCG: IF I’M BEING FAIR, I THINK YOU BOTH DID WHAT YOU DID FOR THE SAME REASONS.   
CCG: YOU’RE BOTH HIGHBLOODS AND IT’S PART OF YOUR NATURE.   
CCG: I SHOULD HAVE BEEN SURPRISED THAT WE ALL MADE IT THAT FAR WITHOUT KILLING EACH OTHER.   
CCG: EXCEPT FOR ARADIA KILLING VRISKA.   
CCG: AND THEN VRISKA KILLING TAVROS.   
CCG: AND TEREZI KILLING VRISKA AGAIN BUT SHE HAD A GOOD REASON FOR THAT ONE.   
CCG: BUT VRISKA-RELATED MURDER ASIDE, WE WERE DOING PRETTY WELL FOR A BUNCH OF TROLLS STUCK TOGETHER IN CLOSE QUARTERS.   
CCG: MAYBE IT WAS HAVING ALL THOSE IMPS TO KILL THAT HELPED CALM US ALL DOWN.   
CCG: ANYWAY I WOULD BE A HYPOCRITE FOR FORGIVING GAMZEE BUT NOT YOU WHEN YOU BOTH COMMITTED THE SAME CRIME.   
CCG: ESPECIALLY SINCE MORE OF GAMZEE’S VICTIMS STAYED DEAD.   
PCA: fef   
PCA: she wwas the one wwho stayed dead   
CCG: YEAH. 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904313)


	2. Chapter 2

PCA: she wwasnt evven supposed to die   
PCA: none a them wwere   
PCA: except maybe sol   
PCA: i figured hed take issue wwith my plan   
PCA: but i thought fef wwould take my side   
PCA: maybe wwe wwerent moirails anymore but if it came dowwn to me or him she HAD to take my side   
PCA: wwevve been together forevver   
PCA: or wwe wwere   
PCA: she only just met him   
CCG: MAYBE IF YOUR PLAN WASN’T SO BATSHIT INSANE.   
CCG: I MEAN SERIOUSLY. JOINING JACK?   
CCG: YOU DIDN’T REALLY THINK THAT WOULD WORK, DID YOU?   
PCA: maybe   
CCG: OH WAIT.   
CCG: I GET IT.   
CCG: YOU WANTED HER TO STOP YOU, DIDN’T YOU?   
CCG: YOU THOUGHT IF YOU ACTED INSANE ENOUGH, SHE’D EITHER BECOME YOUR MOIRAIL AGAIN AND TALK YOU DOWN, OR BE FORCED TO AUSPISTICIZE BETWEEN YOU AND SOLLUX, AND YOU’D END UP WITH A QUADRANT FILLED.   
PCA: i dont knoww wwhy she attacked me like that   
PCA: she forced my hand   
CCG: DO YOU UNDERSTAND HOW CREEPY AND MANIPULATIVE THAT IS?   
PCA: it wwouldnt of been creepy and manipulativve if itd wworked   
CCG: YES.   
CCG: YES IT WOULD.   
PCA: no but listen   
PCA: howw does someone stop pitying someone like that   
PCA: i mean if you havve a moirail isnt that fate   
PCA: isnt it supposed to be for life   
PCA: and if you dont pity someone anymore does that mean you nevver did   
PCA: if she wwas evver my moirail she wwouldnt of been able to resist that   
CCG: I’M STARTING TO THINK IT DOESN’T WORK LIKE THAT.   
PCA: wwhat do you mean   
CCG: FATE.   
CCG: I MEAN, OF COURSE FATE EXISTS.   
CCG: WE ARE ALL STUCK IN A MASSIVE TRANSUNIVERSAL CLUSTERFUCK OF NONLINEAR PREDESTINATION.   
CCG: THE ONLY REASON WE DO THE THINGS WE DO IS BECAUSE WE’RE FATED TO DO THEM, AND IF WE DON’T DO THEM, WE END UP DEAD.   
CCG: AND IF WE DO THEM, WE MIGHT END UP DEAD ANYWAY.   
CCG: BUT I THINK FATE AS IT APPLIES TO QUADRANTS IS A GARGANTUAN CROCK OF HOOFBEASTSHIT.   
CCG: MAYBE BACK IN THE REAL WORLD, PEOPLE COULD REALLY HAVE ONE TRUE MOIRAIL AND KISMESIS AND MATESPRIT AND AUSPISTICE.   
CCG: BUT THERE’S ONLY ABOUT SIX TROLLS LEFT IN EXISTENCE, AND AT LEAST TWO OF THEM ARE FILLING QUADRANTS WITH AN ALIEN SPECIES.   
CCG: AND TWO OF THEM ARE OFF FUCKING AROUND IN THE AFTERLIFE PLAYING PSYCHOPOMP.   
CCG: AND ONE OF THEM HAS BEEN MISSING FOR A SWEEP.   
CCG: AND THEN THERE’S ME. 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904336)


	3. Chapter 3

CCG: I DON’T KNOW, MAYBE I REALLY AM FATED TO NEVER GET PAST ONE PARTIALLY FILLED QUADRANT WITH AFOREMENTIONED MISSING TROLL.   
CCG: MAYBE THOSE TROLLS I WAS FATED TO FILL QUADRANTS WITH DIED BACK WHEN ALTERNIA WAS DESTROYED.   
CCG: BUT IF I BELIEVE THAT’S THE CASE, THEN THAT MEANS ANY RELATIONSHIP I HAVE RIGHT NOW IS SOMEHOW INFERIOR TO WHAT I COULD HAVE HAD IF LIFE HAD GONE DIFFERENTLY.   
CCG: AND I THINK THAT’S UNFAIR.   
CCG: MAYBE IN SOME ALTERNATE TIMELINE I DID FILL A QUADRANT WITH A MOIRAIL WHO COMPLEMENTED ME PERFECTLY AND NEVER LEFT ME, BUT DOES THAT MEAN THAT WHAT HAPPENED WITH GAMZEE DIDN’T REALLY EXIST?   
PCA: yes   
CCG: WHY?   
PCA: because if it did exist then that means that fef and i really wwere moirails but then she stopped carin for me   
PCA: howw wwould   
PCA: howw wwould that make me feel better   
PCA: knowwin she used to care for me   
CCG: WOULD YOU RATHER THINK SHE NEVER DID?   
PCA: yeah   
PCA: at least if she nevver cared for me i could hate her for leadin me on   
PCA: if she used to care for me but stopped that means i did somethin to make her stop and i wwas too stupid to see it   
PCA: maybe i could of done something to fix it   
CCG: RELATIONSHIPS END SOMETIMES.   
CCG: IT HAPPENS.   
CCG: BELIEVE ME, THAT’S LIKE THE PREMISE OF HALF OF THE ROMANCES I’VE EVER READ.   
CCG: USUALLY IT LEADS TO SOMETHING BETTER.   
CCG: IT WAS BETTER FOR FEFERI TO DUMP YOU THAN TO KEEP ON FAKING IT TO KEEP FROM HURTING YOUR FEELINGS.   
CCG: ESPECIALLY SINCE YOU’D BEEN FAKING IT FOR A WHILE, PRETENDING TO BE PALE WHEN YOU REALLY WANTED HER FLUSHED.   
CCG: YOU HAD SOMETHING GOOD FOR A SHORT TIME AND NOW IT’S OVER AND THAT’S JUST   
CCG: LIFE, I GUESS.   
PCA: that doesnt sound like you kar   
CCG: I’M A SWEEP OLDER.   
PCA: im not   
CCG: WELL, YOU’RE DEAD.   
PCA: i think i keep   
PCA: resettin or someting   
PCA: like howw wwe started this convversation   
PCA: sometimes i think im still alivve   
PCA: and sometimes i knoww im dead   
PCA: but i cant hold onto that memory   
PCA: i think youre the first troll ivve talked to since i died   
PCA: the first real one anywway   
PCA: if you are real   
PCA: or maybe i just dont remember my other convversations   
PCA: maybe i wwont remember this one   
CCG: WHERE ARE YOU RIGHT NOW?   
PCA: at first i wwas on lowwaa   
PCA: noww i think im on the rooftop wwhere kan killed me   
PCA: i cant feel my legs 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904338)


	4. Chapter 4

CCG: YOU CAN TAKE CONTROL, I THINK.   
CCG: THE OTHER DEAD TROLLS I’VE MET MANAGED TO GET SOME SENSE OF PHYSICAL CONTINUITY TOGETHER.   
CCG: THEY DON’T HAVE TO KEEP REPLAYING THEIR DEATHS.   
PCA: is that wwhat im doin   
CCG: I DON’T KNOW.   
CCG: I THINK SO.   
PCA: can i see you   
CCG: IF YOU WANT.   
CCG: I THINK IT’S YOUR DREAM, SO YOU HAVE TO BE THE ONE TO CHANGE IT.   
PCA: howw   
CCG: IT’S A DREAM.   
CCG: YOU HAVE TO BELIEVE IT’S GOING TO HAPPEN.   
PCA: i havve to believve that youre already here   
CCG: YES.   
PCA: kar   
CCG: WHAT.   
PCA: wwhy didnt you come vvisit me on lowwaa   
CCG: WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS. IT WAS INFESTED WITH PISSED OFF ANGELS.   
PCA: yeah it wwas fuckin terrifyin   
PCA: did you evver think   
PCA: hmm that eridan guy could really use some help   
CCG: DID YOU EVER THINK “MAYBE I SHOULD LEAVE MY PLANET AND VISIT SOMEONE ELSE FOR A CHANGE”?   
CCG: “SOMEONE WHO ISN’T SOLLUX”?   
PCA: i couldnt leavve the angels   
CCG: IN RETROSPECT, WE PROBABLY SHOULDN’T HAVE LEFT YOU ALONE WITH THOSE ANGELS.   
CCG: I THINK THEY SERIOUSLY FUCKED UP YOUR PAN.   
PCA: they talked to me   
CCG: I DON’T EVEN WANT TO KNOW WHAT THOSE FEATHERY ASSHOLES HAD TO SAY.   
PCA: they helped me realize some things   
CCG: ULTIMATELY I GUESS WHAT HAPPENED WAS WHAT HAD TO HAPPEN FOR THE ALPHA TIMELINE TO CONTINUE, BUT THAT DOESN’T MAKE THOSE ANGELS ANY LESS CREEPY.   
PCA: wwe wwere nevver gonna wwin   
PCA: the game wwas fixed from the beginnin   
PCA: maybe i did wwant fef to stop me but i really did think that if i could of joined jack i might of got through it alivve   
PCA: hes the wwinnin side   
PCA: you still havve a chance kar   
CCG: I’M NOT GOING TO JOIN THE ENEMY JUST TO SURVIVE.   
CCG: MAYBE THAT MEANS I’LL DIE BUT AT LEAST I’LL DIE WITH SOME TINY AMOUNT OF DIGNITY, WHICH IS MORE THAN I REALLY DESERVE.   
CCG: YOU SHOULD HAVE JUST TALKED TO US INSTEAD OF GOING OFF ON THIS RIDICULOUS PLAN.   
PCA: wwhy bother   
PCA: no one wwould of listened   
CCG: SO YOU TALKED TO THE ANGELS BUT NOT US?   
PCA: the angels didnt avvoid me   
CCG: DID YOU HIT ON THEM?   
PCA: fuck you kar im not that pathetic   
PCA: you see this is the wwhole thing if youd just PAID ATTENTION rather than LAUGHIN AT ME maybe no one wwoulda DIED   
CCG: I’M NOT LAUGHING AT YOU.   
CCG: BUT FUCK YOU TOO. WE WERE ALL BUSY. LOOK, I KNOW I WAS A TERRIBLE LEADER. SIX TROLLS ENDED UP DEAD ON MY WATCH. THERE WERE SO MANY THINGS GOING ON THAT COULD HAVE BEEN STOPPED BEFORE THEY TURNED DEADLY BUT EVERYONE WAS SO INVOLVED WITH THEIR OWN ISSUES THAT WE ALL LET IT GO TOO FAR.   
CCG: REMEMBER OUR PACT? IT WAS AFTER THIS CONVERSATION, SO YOU MIGHT NOT. YOU WERE MISERABLE AND IT WAS OBVIOUS. I WAS PRETTY MISERABLE TOO. I HADN’T SLEPT IN A MONTH. WE DECIDED THAT IF THINGS GOT REALLY HARD, WE WOULD TRY TO HELP EACH OTHER OUT, LIKE EMERGENCY STAND-IN MOIRAILS WITHOUT THE LONG TERM COMMITMENT.   
CCG: BUT YOU DIDN’T BOTHER TO DO THAT. YOU TALKED TO ME *FIVE MINUTES* BEFORE YOU WENT ON YOUR KILLING SPREE BUT YOU NEVER ONCE THOUGHT TO MENTION THAT YOU WERE, OH LET’S SEE, THINKING OF JOINING OUR ENEMY AND MAYBE MURDERING SOLLUX WHILE YOU WERE AT IT.   
CCG: I CAN’T READ YOUR FUCKING MIND.   
CCG: MAYBE I WASN’T THE MOST ATTENTIVE FRIEND BUT YOU CAN’T BLAME ME FOR YOUR PSYCHOTIC KILLING SPREE. THAT WAS ALL YOU.   
CCG: AND NO, TO GO BACK TO AN EARLIER POINT, FEFERI DIDN’T “FORCE YOUR HAND” WHEN YOU MURDERED HER. YOU BROUGHT A HOPE-FUELED GOD-WEAPON TO A TRIDENT FIGHT, AND YOU DIDN’T EVEN HESITATE BEFORE BLASTING A HOLE RIGHT THROUGH HER.   
CCG: THE ONLY PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS MASSACRE WAS YOU, ERIDAN.   
PCA: i remember our pact   
CCG: IS THAT ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY?   
PCA: no   
PCA: look   
PCA: i just   
CCG: YOU JUST WHAT?   
PCA: i   
PCA: fucked up   
PCA: i made a fuckin mistake ok   
PCA: i get that noww   
PCA: i wwrote you all off and i wwas gonna throww in my lot wwith the wwinnin side   
PCA: fef wwas gonna decide to come wwith me and i wwas gonna wwatch you all cry and beg for mercy wwhile jack destroyed you   
PCA: and you all wwoulda been so sorry for laughin at me and talkin about howw gross i wwas   
PCA: and maybe at the last second i wwoulda let you all livve   
PCA: or maybe not   
PCA: i hadnt decided on that yet   
PCA: that wwas wwhat i wwas thinkin kar   
PCA: my backup plan wwas that fef wwould talk me dowwn and she wwould be so sorry for leavvin me   
PCA: she wwould realize wwhat a close call it wwas   
PCA: and she wwould promise to nevver do it again   
PCA: i knoww these wwere just fantasies   
PCA: i guess i kneww it at the time too   
PCA: but it wwas just   
PCA: so temptin   
CCG: DO YOU WANT ME TO SAY I’M SORRY FOR NOT PAYING ENOUGH ATTENTION?   
PCA: only if you mean it   
CCG: I REALLY AM. I WISH I’D HAD MORE ATTENTION TO GIVE. GAMZEE RAN OUT OF SOPOR AND STARTED TO SOBER UP, AND I DIDN’T NOTICE. I SENT EQUIUS AFTER HIM, EVEN THOUGH I KNEW EQUIUS HAD PROBLEMS WITH ORDERING HIGHBLOODS AROUND, AND GAMZEE KILLED HIM IN FRONT OF HIS OWN MOIRAIL, AND THEN FOR GOOD MEASURE HE KILLED HER TOO. VRISKA HAD HER OWN AGENDA GOING ON WITH THE HUMANS, AND TAVROS OF ALL PEOPLE WAS THE FIRST PERSON TO ACTUALLY TRY TO STOP HER, AND SHE MURDERED HIM. SHE WAS GOING TO GO AFTER JACK TOO, NOT TO JOIN HIM BUT TO KILL HIM, AND TEREZI WAS THE ONE WHO HAD TO STOP HER BEFORE SHE GOT US ALL KILLED. WHERE WAS I IN ALL OF THIS? SITTING IN THE FUCKING COMPUTER LAB MAKING MEMOS AND TROLLING HUMANS. I THOUGHT I WAS KEEPING US ALL TOGETHER BUT I WAS WRONG, AND EVEN IF I’D HAD A DOZEN HANDS I STILL WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN ABLE TO PUT OUT ALL THE FIRES. YOU WERE ONE OF THOSE FIRES AND IT MAKES ME SICK NOW TO THINK OF HOW MISERABLE YOU WERE AND HOW I COULD HAVE CHANGED THINGS. BUT I DIDN’T. BECAUSE I DIDN’T PAY ENOUGH ATTENTION.   
CCG: I’M SORRY.   
CCG: I’M STILL NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR WHAT YOU DID, BUT FOR WHAT IT’S WORTH, I WISH I COULD HAVE STOPPED YOU. 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904340)


	5. Chapter 5

ERIDAN: that sounded kind of pale   
KARKAT: DON’T.   
ERIDAN: sorry   
KARKAT: NO, I JUST MEAN THAT I HAVE A MOIRAIL.   
KARKAT: SORT OF.   
KARKAT: IT’S COMPLICATED.   
ERIDAN: i didnt mean to hit on you again   
ERIDAN: its sorta a reflex   
KARKAT: IT’S OKAY.   
KARKAT: YOU’RE NOT REALLY THAT FAR OFF BASE.   
ERIDAN: ...   
ERIDAN: wwhat   
KARKAT: I WISH YOU WEREN’T DEAD.   
KARKAT: YOU SHARED MY TASTE IN MOVIES.   
KARKAT: YOU DIDN’T MIND TALKING ABOUT ROMANCE WITH ME.   
KARKAT: I MISS THAT.   
KARKAT: I MISS THE TIME BEFORE THE GAME STARTED WHEN WE ACTUALLY HAD CONVERSATIONS.   
KARKAT: AND WHEN WE FIRST MET IN REAL LIFE, IN THE MEDIUM.   
KARKAT: EVERYTHING’S GONE SO WRONG SINCE THEN.   
KARKAT: MIND IF I SIT HERE?   
ERIDAN: i havvent figured out howw to put myself together yet   
KARKAT: I THINK IT FOLLOWS THE SAME PRINCIPLES.   
KARKAT: YOU JUST HAVE TO BELIEVE IT.   
ERIDAN: im tryin   
ERIDAN: kar i miss all that too   
ERIDAN: if i hadnt done all that shit id still be on the meteor wwith you right noww   
KARKAT: NO, PROBABLY NOT.   
KARKAT: IT WOULD HAVE PUT US IN A DOOMED TIMELINE. ONE WAY OR ANOTHER, WE’D HAVE ALL ENDED UP DEAD.   
ERIDAN: then wwed both be dead   
ERIDAN: thats not so bad   
ERIDAN: you could share my dream bubble   
ERIDAN: wwhoops i hit on you again   
ERIDAN: wwait kar wwhat 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904341)


	6. Chapter 6

ERIDAN: um   
ERIDAN: wwhat wwas that   
KARKAT: HERE I AM CRITICIZING YOU FOR MAKING SEXUAL ADVANCES AND THEN I KISS YOU WITHOUT EVEN ASKING FIRST.   
KARKAT: THAT WAS DUMB.   
ERIDAN: uh   
ERIDAN: im not complainin   
ERIDAN: but   
ERIDAN: wwhat   
KARKAT: THIS WHOLE THING WAS SO STUPID.   
KARKAT: YOU KNOW I DIDN’T EVEN REALIZE YOU WERE HITTING ON ME UNTIL THE FIRST TIME WE HAD THIS CONVERSATION?   
KARKAT: I WAS SO BLIND TO SO MANY THINGS EVEN THOUGH I THOUGHT I WAS THE MASTER OF ROMANCE.   
KARKAT: SOMETIMES I WONDER HOW I MADE IT THIS FAR IN LIFE WITHOUT SETTING MYSELF ON FIRE.   
ERIDAN: sorry kar but i think i need you to spell it out for me   
KARKAT: I THOUGHT ABOUT YOU A LOT AFTER EVERYTHING HAPPENED.   
KARKAT: I TALKED TO OTHER DEAD VERSIONS OF YOU.   
KARKAT: I YELLED A LOT AT THE FIRST ONES I MET.   
KARKAT: BUT EVENTUALLY I GUESS I STARTED TO UNDERSTAND YOU A BIT MORE.   
KARKAT: I WANTED TO FIX YOUR MISERABLE LIFE.   
KARKAT: A LITTLE TOO LATE AS USUAL.   
KARKAT: SO...   
KARKAT: IS THAT... OKAY?   
ERIDAN: can you kiss me again   
ERIDAN: i need some more empirical evvidence   
KARKAT: IT’S STUPID THINKING THAT I CAN FIX ANYTHING.   
ERIDAN: kar its okay   
ERIDAN: could you just   
ERIDAN: remind me   
ERIDAN: if i forget again   
KARKAT: I WON’T LET YOU FORGET. 

[==>](http://archiveofourown.org/works/512758/chapters/904342)


	7. Chapter 7

ERIDAN: stay here until you wwake up   
KARKAT: I WILL. 


End file.
